SPECIAL EDITION SUPER NCAA CHAMPIONSHIP SPECTACULAR!!!!!!

It's a matchup of cats and dogs but the only thing that's going to be raining is 3's. UK, led by a couple of cool cats from the same litter in Andrew and Aaron Harrison, enters the contest having finally put together all the pieces after not living up to expectations in the regular season. UCONN has made an improbable run to the finals behind the efforts of Shabazz Napier who will be appearing in his final collegiate game before becoming the second Shabazz in the NBA later this year. Unfortunately for Shabazz and his crew of arctic pups, the Kentucky Wildcats are going to win this matchup and using a set of expert analysis and stats hand picked to support my cause I'll prove it to you. Of course, like any good article, this evidence will be presented in the form of a list accompanied by gifs.

1. The Cats Are Smarter

Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert and a man who I assume has played basketball at some point in his life writes:

"Recently I answered the question of whether my dog (Snickers) or my cat (Zoey) is smarter.

My dog loves treats and is largely bored by the stuff I put in her food bowl. She eats it if she’s hungry enough, but she loves special treats. Now here’s the interesting part: If I take a pellet of food directly from her dish and present it as a special treat, she snarfs it down as if it were the best food in the world. And I can do this with her face literally one foot from a full bowl of food. In front of her eyes I pick up a boring pellet from the bowl and it magically becomes a special treat because it is now in my hand – the place from which all delicious treats originate. I can repeat this trick dozens of times and not once does Snickers think to bypass the hand and eat the big bowl of food that is directly in front of her snout.

Okay, so that’s how smart the dog is.

My cat, Zoey, developed an odd habit some years ago, or so I thought. When I walk anywhere near her food bowl, which generally has food in it, she meows to get my attention and demands to be petted. But when I go to pet her, she starts guiding me toward the bowl until I’m petting her at the same time she’s eating. Yes, she “George Costanzas” me.

George Costanza was a character on the old Seinfeld show. In one well-known episode George tried to combine the thrill of sex with the pleasure of eating a sandwich, doing both at the same time. Zoey has literally trained me to pet her while she eats, thus getting a double-tap of pleasure when most animals would have settled for either one.

Advantage: cat"

(Source: http://dilbert.com/blog/entry/cats_or_dogs/)

2. The Cats Are Faster

Basketball isn't just about speed, but it certainly is important. Yahoo user Malamute Breeder reports "I don't have any firm numbers on this, but from my experience, I would say that an AVERAGE [Siberian Husky] (not a highly conditioned athlete), would have sprint speeds somewhere around 40-48 kph (25-30 mph)." 

(Source: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100717153148AAkkY9R)

The speed of a wildcat wasn't available in less than 4 seconds of googling, so we'll substitute the Cheetah. Cheetah's can run 70 mph or 113 kph.(http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/big-cats/facts/) This is well over twice the speed of huskies. If the Cats want to run up and down the floor and make this a fast paced game, expect them to leave the Huskies in the dust.

3. The Cats Jump Higher

Jumping is very important in basketball. If your release point is higher than your opponent can jump then your shots won't be blocked. According to Yahoo user Chrystal M, "I have had two huskies and they have never even tried to climb or jump..." (Source: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080129152029AAtJPzv)

Wildcats can do this:

So there you have it, the Kentucky Wildcats will be crowned national championships in North Texas tonight.
Other sources: My ass